Half of us
by atiketook
Summary: Ethelred believed she was free and now she's looking for someone that might help her. No matter where she runs, she always has enemies. No matter how far she runs, she can't hide. Rated M for language, violence, gore and sexual situations.
1. Chapter 1

Half of us.

I do not own LOTR movies and books. Only the OC's are mine. Sorry for any grammar mistakes.

 **Bold** : other language.

 _Italic_ : thoughts, past events or distant conversation.

The young girl nervously glanced around before planting her clawed hands on the soft soil surrounding the stream. Thirsty, she plunged her face to the nose in the cold water and quenched her thirst.

A branch cracked closely and her long pointed ears flicked back a bit as she raised her head. She let out a relieved sigh when a partridge slowly waddled out of the bush it had been hiding in.

The teenager rose and walked back to the deer she had killed earlier and resisted the temptation to take a few pieces of raw meat. Its blood smell was making her pupils shrink and she licked her pointy fangs before shaking her head. The Innkeeper would notice the missing pieces of meat or the blood that would certainly stain her tunic.

She grimaced; his dear wife would also certainly offer her to cook a part for her…And once cooked the meat would taste awful… It disgusted her; both ways. Raw meat was absolutely repugnant and dirty business and cooked meat now tasted bland and did not appeal to her anymore. One was disgusting in appearance and tasting like heaven and the other was quite the opposite.

The girl also knew she would never complain nor refuse his wife; the couple was charming and very kind…the only people that had been kind to her since…since some time. The Innkeeper had accepted her help; he was providing a roof over her head and companionship. He also did not ask a lot of questions, which was agreeable for her.

In return, she did all kind of jobs around. She hunted for him, supplying him with the meat he needed to feed his clients and she was giving him a hand with his farm.

Plus, the Inn was also opened late at night, serving as a bar; it was useful to have someone like her around to watch drunken men and get them out if need be.

Stretching, she pierced the nearest three with her thin claws and proceeded to sharpen them on the bark. She dragged them down and shuddered at the pleasant sensation.

'' _I must look like a big cat…_ '' She thought stupidly.

However, since she became like that, she learned this little ritual was very important to keep her claws sharp and to prevent little skins to accumulate around their bases.

Ethelred looked down at her clawed hands and put her leather gloves on; if the village people learned what she was… and they did not even like her to begin with.

The teenager replaced her bow and quiver before picking up the animal corpse and beginning to walk out of the forest, toward the village.

xxxxxx

'' Ethelred, you should not carry around beasts like this on your shoulders; you will hurt yourself! '' The elder woman exclaimed.

The innkeeper's wife was a woman nearing sixty years, wearing a puffy dress and apron at all time. Her rounded cheeks always seemed to be red from some efforts.

The girl closed the kitchen back door behind her and let the animal slide to the floor.

'' It's just a deer, ma'am Leofhild…and a small one at that.''

The innkeeper appeared, a large smile on his face: '' Ah! Ethelred, quite a nice catch you got us! I will butcher it later so my Leo can put it in the stew for supper.'' He said happily as he carried a tray full of empty mugs.

'' We have visitors?'' the girl asked.

''Yes; men from the war…on mission apparently. They are staying here for the night. ''

''Have they said anything about…'' she trailed off.

He frowned and shook his head: '' No…nothing about that.'' He responded to her incomplete question, knowing what she was talking about.

Ethelred looked down and let out a deep growl, making Leofhild jumped, startled.

'' Excuse me, sir.'' She excused herself curtly and went outside, behind the inn stables.

Two months and a half she had been here and no one had heard of the person she was looking for…no clues about him or his whereabouts.

Then she had _other_ problems… bigger ones. She shivered at the mere thought of these. Just to reassure herself, she pitched her nose in the air, smelling the wind.

Horses, pines, humans…. Dry herbs. Yep, everything was normal and under control. She stared dejectedly toward the east, the large meadow in front of her bathed by the sunlight.

Suddenly, her right ear twitched; someone was coming her way

''Ethelred…''

Slowly she turned to him: '' Sir?''

The innkeeper scratched his graying beard: '' I do not know what you seek exactly, but you will find what you need someday, if you are patient and keep looking.'' Dernhelm said to comfort her.

The girl sighed: '' Did you need me for something? ''

He extended an arm, probably to give her a friendly tap on the shoulder, but she quickly jumped out of his reach. His hand stopped in the air and he stared at her, confused:

'' You know we wish you no harm… Are you afraid of me? You've been here for over two months… do you not trust us by now?'' the man said on a hurt tone.

Her long ears fell to the side of her head, just like a sad dog: ''I-I am sorry…no, of course not, I'm not afraid of you; you're a good man. ''

Afraid of him…where was this man getting these ideas?! _She_ was the monster! She had fangs and claws for Eru's sake!

Dernhelm smiled a bit at her ruffled state and guilty eyes; he knew now she had not meant to offend him.

He grinned: '' You know…I spared you a piece of that deer… and Leofhild has not touched it…''

Ethelred frowned: '' why? ''

The man shrugged: '' I noticed that you preferred your meat raw… I don't know why, but I know you can't help it. I also know you've been eating whatever Leo has served you only to please her.''

Her cheek reddened and she looked away: '' well…thank you.''

Xxxxxx

Ethelred sat alone at 'her' table in the corner of the inn first floor. It was near a wall, half hidden by the shadow and half lit by the fireplace close by. She raised the heavy mug of beer to her lips and drank a few gulps of it as she surveyed the people around.

Dernhelm was sitting with the men that had arrived today, listening to the recent news and how war was going. She was listening too, not that they knew it or noticed. Dunlandings had been raiding the Rohan for some times now, Orcs as well. King Théoden had not been himself for years and was apparently advised by the wrong person.

The girl knew things were getting bad in Rohan, but now she heard that Orcs had also been seen near Gondor's borders or inside of them. Well…war was moving, expending every day.

One horseman began to speak in a hushed voice and the others fell silent, drawn by his words.

''… _survivors from raids are speaking of a new race of Orcs… Bigger, stronger; they can bear the sun's light and they are fast and tough; they can run for miles_ … ''

She watched Dernhelm's face closely; his brows were knitted together in concentration.

''… _some soldiers have seen them too…well, those who were fast enough to flee from them…Most of these beast are taller than men, broader too. They stood straight, just like us, but they have claws and fangs… like these vicious Orcs_. ''

Ethelred's fingers curled on the table, her claws piercing her gloves.

' _'_ _What do they look like? I mean, besides the claws and fangs_.'' One of them asked.

'' _Their skin is like dark copper, brown or black. They have hair like horses, thick and long. Otherwise…I can't tell: I've never seen these beasts before_. ''

One of the men threw his head backward and emptied his beer in a few gulps, before slamming his mug on the table: '' … _And you don't want to meet them: I have seen the remains of the villages that were attacked… I have seen butchered children, elders, women…_ '' He snorted: ''… _the women; believe me… they would have preferred to die quickly._ '' He said somberly.

All the soldiers gave him a look of horror; Ethelred's claws dug deeply in the wooden surface of the table, leaving four parallel marks.

' _'_ _They call them Uruk-Hai…_ ''

''You should try to smile a little more darling; you look like you're about to tear something apart! No man is attracted to a brooding girl! '' Leofhild pulled her out of her reverie.

The lady refilled her cup, but only half way, winking to her. The innkeeper's wife said it was not appropriate for a young lady like her to drink that much.

The teenager snorted: '' You want me to smile, eh? Look at this.''

The girl stretched her lips, revealing her sharp fangs and the two pointy teeth surrounding each one of them. At least, only these teeth were weird…the rest of them were pretty normal looking. Leofhild appeared deflated by her behavior and Ethelred chuckled bitterly: '' There goes my non-existing suitor…''

The woman shook herself and placed her fists on her hips: '' Tst! None of your sassy attitude now! '' she said as she swiped her with the dishcloth in her hand before leaving behind her counter again.

The young girl tried to heed her words and released the tension in her muscles and tried to enjoy the warmth of the fire and the bitter taste of the beer on her tongue. She stretched her legs and placed her booted feet on the chair facing her. It could be far worse for her… This place looked like heaven compared to before…she had wandered alone in the wild for some time…she spent a few nights under the rain… she slept into trees… in disgusting, humid caves. Hunting and drinking into streams was not that bad…it was the lonely nights and days. It was the chilly wind that went through her tunic and pants. It was the fear that gripped her inside: it kept her looking over her shoulder all the time. It kept her constantly smelling the air; searching for any threats.

Unconsciously, her hand reached for the scars hidden by the collar of her tunic…sometimes, it felt as if they were still hurting. There were at least three or four of them, placed low on the base of her nape. She sighed and drank some more.

Finally, the girl rose bringing her mug with her, drew out the knife at her right hip and began to throw it at the target nailed to the wall in the back of the room.

After a few minutes, Dernhelm showed himself: '' You looked pissed…Care to share? '' He said as he leaned on one of the beams.

'' who says I'm pissed? '' she grumbled.

The man rubbed the back of his head: '' well…for one you've been drinking for at least two hours and now you are destroying my target, _again_.''

Ethelred glanced at him then at the men, who were all staring at her.

'' You came here because these lads are curious about me.'' She pointed out.

'' Excuse them; they have never seen an elf before.''

Ethelred wanted to laugh; an elf… Ah! She'd give anything to be an elf. People saw her pointy ears and they believed what she told them. And none of them had ever truly seen one so they had nothing to compare with…

Elves had no fangs and no claws.

Their ears were almost human and not as long as hers.

Their noses were normal…hers had a feline touch to it.

Finally, they had no vertical pupils.

The peasants around believed anything.


	2. Chapter 2

I do not own LOTR movies and books. Only the OC's are mine. Sorry for any grammar mistakes.

 **Bold** : other language.

 _Italic_ : thoughts, past events or distant conversation.

 _Sharp teeth held the skin of her nape, making sure she wouldn't try to wriggle somewhere. The heavy body above her was grunting and sweating against her back while she kept her eyes tightly shut. Her wrists were firmly held in much larger hands, pinned to the furs under them; there was no escaping this for her_. _He-_

Ethelred woke up with a start, breathing hard as pearls of sweat glided down her forehead. The girl released a heavy sigh; glad it was just a dream. She turned her head to look at the window; the sun was rising, but it was still dark outside.

The teenager pushed the blankets off of her and walked to the basin of water to quickly wash her face. She then proceeded to mechanically dress herself, putting a fresh pair of pants on and a tunic over her white shirt. It took her a few minutes to find her leather boots that were hiding under the bed.

She brushed her long, thick hair that once had been blond like most people of Rohan. It was now a pale brown and as coarse as a horse mane. Ethelred braided the brown locks and went downstairs, careful to be silent.

Once in the kitchen, she lit the two ovens' fires, so Leofhild could cook breakfast to their clients and prepare the bread later. She grabbed a cloth a cleaned the tables and the bar counter before sweeping the floor. She picked up the abandoned mugs around and began to wash them.

She calmly scrubbed the cups and glasses, her mind elsewhere.

Her ears rose straight on her head and one corner of her lips turned upward.

'' You can't sneak on me, Dernhelm.''

'' how can you do it? How do you always know it's me!? '' he said on an exasperate tone.

She glanced at him over her shoulder and pointed her long ears: '' I don't have those for the look you know. '' She then tapped her nose: '' …And I smelled you.''

Turning her back to him, she continued her previous task. The innkeeper opened a panel against the wall and grabbed an apple from the shelf before sitting in front of her on a bar stool. He watched her for sometimes while he chewed on his fruit and it was beginning to make her uneasy.

'' What are you doing here, Ethelred? ''

She curved one of her brows: '' I'm…cleaning the dishes? ''

He shook his head: '' No… I mean how did you arrive here and why? There is nothing here…there are maybe 40 people in this small village… We are deep in the East Emnet, almost in the Wold, surrounded by forest and fields…It is not normal for someone so young to be travelling alone or to be so far from her family. ''

She looked down and kept scrubbing the dirty glass in her hands. '' There is nothing to say Dernhelm… I already told you: I wanted to travel, I wanted peace and this place is perfect. It's calm and peaceful; I like it. For your information, I'm not that young…I'm seventeen. ''

'' Seventeen… You're still a kid… How can a kid wish for peace eh? You arrived here with your clothes torn and fully armed, looking like you've just sprinted a hundred miles without stopping! To me…it looks like you're running from something, lass.'' He pointed out in a serious voice.

His questions were a tad annoying now.

'' It can look like whatever you want, Innkeeper.'' She grumbled.

He threw his hands in the air: '' There she goes calling me 'innkeeper' again. You only do that when you're upset with me. I understand that you don't like me asking questions, but you've been with us for almost three months! We don't know your last name, we don't know where you are from, we- we know nothing of you! ''

Ethelred muttered under her breath and moved around the kitchen, stowing the mugs and cups away.

'' I am no one Dernhelm; there is nothing to know about me… '' she sighed.

The man rose from his chair to come nearer: '' Listen…I don't know how it works for elves, but if you are fleeing from an arranged marriage, know that I will never declare your presence here if some elf lord comes knocking on my door! Nor Leofhild! ''

The teenager burst out laughing: '' I'm not engaged! You're funny.''

His narrowed suspiciously at her: '' You are always listening to everything, you always sniff the air like some hunting hound, you're nervous… Just like you were constantly watching your back. Are you a criminal? ''

She shook her head: '' No. Of course not…''

Well… She could be. Scratch that; she's a little piece of shit that doesn't deserve to live. She's done things that make her skin crawl just thinking of it. She regrets a lot of actions she did in the past.

Dernhelm finally let out an exhausted breath and walked toward the stairs, probably to go wake his wife and dress himself properly: '' I give up. ''

Ethelred chuckled silently; arranged marriage…well she had to give him credits this time: it was pretty common around. It would probably have been her fate too. There were many things she missed about her old life, but marriage to a stranger was not one of them. Sadness invaded her at the thought: no man would want her now…even less if they'd know what tainted her blood and how spoiled she truly was.

Her own appearance was almost repulsive to her; not that she was now 'ugly'…she was just…different. She wasn't wearing dresses nor behaving like a girl her age should. It did not tend to attract men.

Her mother had diligently reminded of that fact; she had not been one for dresses and tea parties even back then. Her mother and she had always been at odds… They were always arguing and fighting. Ethelred wanted to run in the wild, carefree with her bow and arrows and enjoyed the forest. Her mother wanted her to learn how to sew, weave and to act like a proper lady. Sometimes, she had thought she hated her own mother, now she'd give anything to be with her. Her mom, her little sister and brother and her two older brothers gone to war with her father…She missed them so much; she did not even know if they were alive.

Now, she only had Leofhild to remind her of her lack of manners.

Xxxxxx

Ethelred let out a 'humph!' when Leofhild added another thing in the huge basket she was carrying for her. The basket was already full and the innkeeper's wife kept putting stuff over the cambering pile of trinkets and food.

There was an open market like this every three months apparently, one for each season. It was the first time she went, as she only had been present for the last two months and the teenager already regretted it! Merchants had come from the towns around and the small village was full, as well as the inn, keeping them all very occupied.

'' Oh my goodness! The clothes you make are beautiful Oswald! '' she exclaimed the merchant as she stopped in front of his stand.

The clothes maker eyed Ethelred suspiciously: '' Thank you lady… You didn't have this…aid, last time I've seen you… ''

Leofhild patted her shoulder: '' This is Ethelred; she's been working for us for the last months; she's really helpful. ''

The man finally smiled: '' perhaps you should have brought a mule to bring your things! You will kill the poor lass at this pace! ''

The woman laughed and shook her head: '' Nay. Ethelred is an elf and therefore, she's way stronger than a normal man. I've seen this girl carrying around full grown deers on her shoulders like it was nothing! She can chop wood for hours. A little basket with a few things in it won't kill her.''

The girl mentally grumbled; this basket wasn't little…and it was weighting at least a hundred pound full as it was!

Oswald chuckled when he saw the face she was making, but dropped the subject: ''What can I offer you today, milady?''

Excited, Leofhild joined her hand together: '' I would like a new tunic, for my Dernhelm; you know him…he always finds a way to ruin them! I need something thick and sturdy!'' She then turn to the young girl accompanying her: '' Ethelred? You can head home; I will join you in a few minutes.''

The girl nodded, relieved and began to walk toward the inn, situated to the village's limits.

Xxxxxx

Ethelred struggled to enter through the inn's back door and decided to knock on the door. After a minute or two, Dernhelm appeared.

'' I see Leo has put you to work! Sorry you had to endure this; it was once my job and I confess that I proposed her this morning to take you with her.'' He said sheepishly.

The girl gave him a flat look and stepped inside and deposed the basket on the nearest table.

'' It is alright, your wife is good company and she talks for the both of us.'' She reassured him.

The innkeeper disappeared in the kitchen and came back with a cup full of water:

'' here, you must be thirsty.'' He offered.

She gratefully took it: '' thank you.''

Ethelred gulped down the water and gave him back the mug: ''so...the men left this morning?"

He nodded:" gone to war...to their glory they said...more like going to their death." He muttered somberly.

The girl cocked her head to the side: it was not in his habits to be so negative.

"People will die Dernhelm...but in the end, humans will win. The good always wins: there is always hope for you all." She said to cheer him up.

He grinned: "For us all? You're not included in that?"

The girl shook her head and fixed her eyes to the floor before exiting the building.

Xxxxxx

Later that evening, she was eating silently on her side of the table while the couple discussed. The teenager was tranquilly listening to their idle chat, calm. She scrunched her nose at the carrots and turnip in her plate, knowing she would not have this attitude if she wasn't so well fed here. Not so long ago, she would have killed for these vegetables. Then, she noticed the pair was looking at her expectantly.

"You...asked me a question?"

Dernhelm chuckled and his wife reprimanded her gently.

" I was asking how you found the fair today?"

The girl shrugged: "There were a lot of people."

The woman let out an exasperate sigh: " you are just like my husband! No wonder you two are going along so well." She complained.

Trying to please her host, Ethelred tried again: "I really...liked the clothes this...Oswar makes."

Leofhild almost jumped from excitation on her seat: "I know eh? And his stuff is of great quality! And it's Oswald."

The innkeeper rolled his eyes.

"I also noticed, young lady, that a few pieces of his stock have caught your eyes..." she whispered in a secret-sharing like manner as she rose and waddled away from the dining room.

Her long ears straightened on her head, curious.

The woman reappeared with a thick gray greenish tunic in her hands. Ethelred's eyes widened in surprise and she began to mumble: "you-you shouldn't...have...I don't ...I mean...I..."

Dernhelm was laughing: "I told you Leo you would make her uneasy with your gift!"

Ethelred did not know what to do or say; her face was red and her ears bent backward as shyness invaded her.

Deposing the clothing in Ethelred's laps, his wife waved him off as she took back her seat: '' I saw her staring at it... and we don't pay her—''

'' – But you feed me and I stay under your roof—'' she tried to object.

''—and it's not enough for all you do around! I would have bought you a gown, but I'm certain you would not have worn it… Go try your tunic now! ''

The teenager went into the kitchen, removed the brown tunic she was currently wearing and replaced it with the gray one. She caressed the material on her; it was robust and soft at the same time. There were small embroideries at the collar and the sleeves' ends; it was a beautiful piece of clothing.

The girl walked back into the dining room to Leofhild's utter joy: ''The color is perfect with your eyes; it accentuates their gray shade! ''

Then, the dame critically eyed her and pulled on the edge of it two or three times and straightened the collar.

Blushing again, Ethelred murmured: '' It's beautiful…thank you …it's-it's too much I don't deserve that.''

Dernhelm frowned, rose and headed directly to her. He placed a hand on one of shoulders: '' Ethelred… You are of great help here. You are respectful and you certainly deserve have new clothing. We are happy to have you with us and we hope you will stay for a long time around.'' He told her seriously.

Xxxxxx

Apparently, the merchants would stay around for at least 4 or 5 days, just to be able to sell most of their stock. Ma'am Leofhild was more than done with her shopping, but kept going to the market to chat and look at the remaining articles.

Ethelred had been nervous for the last two days; the wind was bringing her strange scents. A whiff of male musk here and there, leather, grease and iron smells from times to times…Maybe a few Orcs where crossing the forest a few miles from there… Maybe it was the scent of Orcs passing in Dol Guldur North from here? It was hard to tell; she knew if danger was coming toward the village it would be coming from the West…However, the wind had been blowing south for sometimes now…She would not catch properly any scents taking their origins in the West.

The girl also knew she was a bit paranoid since she was here. Everything seemed to be a potential threat, any abnormal smell an unknown danger.

The innkeeper immediately noted she was anxious and he also immediately demanded to know what was wrong with her.

'' You've been jumpy; your ears are always flicking… What's putting you on edge? '' He questioned as he joined her on the balcony at the second floor, where she currently was, scrutinizing the fields and forest around.

'' I'm worrying for no reason again… It's probably nothing.'' She grumbled.

All of sudden, a scream pierced the air soon followed by many others. Ethelred's eyes widened and she glanced at Dernhelm: '' Has Leofhild returned from the market!?''

''No-''

The teenager did not give him time to finish his sentence and she jumped off of the balcony, landing 5 meters lower, on the ground. She started to sprint toward the market; women and men alike were in a state of panic, running around and screaming.

Then, she smelled it: Orcs...or Uruk-hai. Their scent hit her nose, making her nostril shudder.

The girl ran faster, dodging frightened people on her way easily. She was close enough by now to distinguish three dark forms ravaging the merchants' stands.

She could hear their snickering; this village was an easy prey…All men able to fight were gone to war and there weren't many people here.

Her eyes began to search for Leofhild and she quickly spotted her; she was shielding two other women from an advancing Uruk.

Coming like an arrow toward them, Ethelred stepped on a stand and jumped toward the big Uruk, punching him in the face and creating a large gap between him and the scared women. He was a big one for sure and had a nasty look about him; scars travelled his muscled arms and face, multiples rings adorned his left ears and he wore his hair like the typical Uruk-hai.

The girl stood her back to Leofhild, facing the beast.

The male's hand flew to his sore cheek, he took a step toward them and the teenager pinned her ears backward and let out a terrifying roar.

He stopped and his two companions trotted closer. The Uruk appeared confused by her appearance; he then sniffed the air and an expression of shock emerged on his face.

''Holkalsak? '' He recoiled slightly: '' Vogalûrz?''

Xxxxxx

 **Holkalsak** : thin fang.

 **Vogalûrz** : small-one / little-one.


	3. Chapter 3

I do not own LOTR movies and books. Only the OC's are mine. Sorry for any grammar mistakes. R and R!

 **Bold** : black speech.

 _Italic_ : thoughts, past events or distant conversation.

Ethelred growled low in her throat as she heard her nick names. Thin fang and Small one. She showed her teeth to the Uruk, indicating her displeasure.

He opened his arms at his sides in a mock of a welcoming manner: '' **Well, well ,well… I never thought I'd cross road with you again. I know someone who'd pay a large amount to know where you are** … **even more to have you back**.''

'' **Go away, Ugnag; leave this town!** '' She snarled back in Black Speech.

He chuckled: '' **I intend to do just that…After we've taken a few things. What are you doing here? The white skins accepted you back?** ''

One of the Orcs with him leaned toward his taller companion: '' **What is that female? She smells like one of us, but she looks mostly human…''**

The Uruk pushed him away with a sneer: '' **She's one of us, Snaga**! '' He faced her again: '' **So as I was saying… You' with them now? They don't got no problem with you?** ''

'' **Yes I'm with them and they have no problems with me!** '' She then added in a somber voice: '' **Leave**.''

Ugnag growled deeply in his throat and she answered in the same manner.

She turned to Leofhild and the cowering women: '' Ma'am Leofhild… Take them and send the remaining men here…with axes or shovels, I don't care. They intend to rob the stands…They are dangerous.''

The dame's eyes were wide and afraid: ''how-how can you know their language…how-''

Ethelred frowned: '' -It's not the time for questions! Go and do what I said! Hurry!'' She ordered forcefully.

The women scampered off quickly and the girl placed on her attention on the Uruk again. He sent the two orcs back to their scavenging among the merchants' stock.

The big male snorted: '' **How… touching. I bet you didn't even tell them what you were: we're filth to men. They don't just accept us like that!** ''

Ethelred glanced away; no she had not told them…Ugnag was right.

He began to laugh: '' **Oh…you did not tell them… It happened to you already…once. What do you think the white skins will do when they learn what you are? It looks like you forgot what happened last time…** ''

What they will do? They will freak out; that's what.

She changed the subject: ' **' And you? What are you doing here? There is a war going on! It means you deserted…** ''

'' Skai! '' He shook himself and started to circle her. '' **I did. I'm done with war and the race of Men. I'm heading to Mount Gundabad, stopping by Dol Guldur first. I was hoping to grab a female along and a few trinkets to sell!** ''

Her eyes never left his forms and she moved with him, removing her gloves.

' **'** Nar **. You will take the snagas with you and leave. Like I already told you.** ''

The pair turned around each other; the uruk appeared calm, but she knew he was as ready as her to attack.

'' **It is so endearing the way you protect this little shit hole of a village… If only the white skins weren't so blind…They'd immediately known you were one of us…** '' The male sniffed the air **: '' He's had you so many times, that I can still smell him on you…** '' He drawled, licking his sharp teeth.

Her nostrils flared and her eyes lit up with hatred; she roared and the fight began.

Ethelred knew she was no match for an uruk strength, but she was faster and quite nimble. Plus, the girl had had her share of fights with orcs…

Xxxxxx

They were facing each other, panting and bleeding like pig on the market place. Distantly, she could hear the villagers coming. The teenager and Ugnag stared at one other under the stares of the panicking orcs watching them. The beast rumbled deeply in his chest and straightened himself: '' **Gorghaz, Lagduf; we're going**.'' He looked at her: '' ** _He_** **'s looking for you…and his orders are reaching far and many ears, Vogalurz**. ''

The arriving peasants chased after them, but the Orcs were more rapid and they soon lost them.

Ethelred stood there, still a bit shocked by the events. Her left arm was heavily bleeding; Ugnag's claws had deeply dug into her flesh.

Otherwise, she would have 2 or 4 painful bruises; luckily, the combat only lasted a few minutes. Dark, red blood almost black, dripped from her hand to the dry soil of the village.

Abruptly, it hit her: three orcs now knew where she was and they didn't tend to keep secrets among themselves. To add to her worries, Ugnag said _his_ orders were reaching far… If the knowledge of her location was falling in the wrong ears…it would be over for her…and this village.

Dernhelm was the first to come back; he had probably seen her standing there like a lost child.

He approached her cautiously: '' Ethelred…are you alright? You're bleeding.''

She snapped out of it: '' I-I'm fine.''

Slowly, he stepped at her side: '' It looks deep; you need cares.''

The girl nodded and dragged herself after him toward the inn. She cradled her left arm as her eyes fixed the horizon… She liked this place… and now she will be forced to leave. Ethelred had a few days in front of her at most. She needed to be careful now.

Xxxxxx

''…It's alright; I heal faster than humans, Dernhelm.'' She sighed from where she sat in the kitchen, thinking.

The man wanted her to remove her tunic and shirt to see if she needed stitches. Ethelred did not want him to see her back…

'' You're bleeding like a butchered pig; let me check your injury! '' He exclaimed, exasperated.

Curiously, Leofhild was standing at a safe distance from them, watching them silently with an apprehensive look.

The innkeeper turned to his wife for help: '' Leo; tell her! ''

The lady stared at her with glassy eyes: '' The girl knows what is best for her.''

Dernhelm, confused by her behavior, cocked his head to the side: '' Leofhild? ''

She gulped hard: '' She-she spoke with them…she roared… these…these beasts recognized her, Dernhelm. ''

Sagging in her chair, Ethelred's ears flicked to the sides and she turned her head away. The man saw her expression and gave her a baffled look while Leofhild kept pointing out the obvious.

'' Look at her teeth and claws Dern! Did you never wonder why the horses were so scared of her? Why she could never go near them?

The man appeared to be torn on every side, not knowing what to do. Finally, he let out a shaky breath: ''The second she heard the screams and knew you weren't back from the market, she ran to the village Leo. You told me earlier that she jumped on the Orc and protected you. Then she sent you and two other women for help…We owe her.''

Ethelred raised her eyes to him, confused.

''But you see what she is n-''

'' She is but a girl Leofhild, one who probably just saved your life.''

Feeling responsible and guilty for the present argument between the couple, the teenager slowly rose, holding her arm: '' I- Leofhild is right, Dernhelm. I knew the Uruk; he knew me too. I have lied to you both: I am not an elf and I am ashamed of my lies.

I'm a monster…I'm sorry. I wasn't always like this: that's the reason of my humanity. I didn't want to hide the truth from you, but no one would have accepted me here. I-I will leave now; thank you for your hospitality. '' She whispered, leaving them astonished.

She headed upstairs and started to gather her meager possessions. Grabbing her leather bag, she began to put her only other pair of pants in.

'' I never said you had to leave.'' The man sighed from where he stood in the doorframe.

Ethelred did not answer and kept packing, her back to the innkeeper.

''Leofhild has been shaken by the situation… she's not truly afraid of you, nor does she hate you.''

Facing him the girl said on low tone: '' I have problems Dernhelm; big ones. I can't stay here. Leofhild is right to be scared: I'm dangerous. ''

'' You're not dangerous: you're just a girl! If you have problems, we will help you… '' he offered gently.

The girl shook her head: help her…how? Hell itself was after her…and she had not a single clue of the where about of the only person who could help her. Dernhelm watched her silently as she finished packing. Ethelred went to the water basin in her room and removed her tunic and shirt with her back to the man. When she heard a loud gasp, she knew he had seen her bare back and the multiples bite scars around her shoulders. She quickly used the torn shirt to wash her wound and bind it before putting on the clean clothes and the tunic over it. She buckled a thick leather belt around her waist and slid a dagger at her hip.

The teenager went to her bed and swung her bag over her shoulder with her bow.

The innkeeper was looking at her with sad eyes: '' You will really leave, eh? ''

'' Yes. I'm only trouble for you, sir.''

He clasped her good shoulder with his hand: '' You're a brave one. I'd offer you a horse, but… Anyway, you take care of yourself and you be careful on the road.''

Silently, she nodded and went downstairs where Leofhild was sat at the table.

'' I'm sorry for the fright you went through, Ma'am. You take care of Dernhelm and yourself. Goodbye Leofhild. ''

The dame only nodded; Ethelred could smell the fear around her.

The girl stepped outside and looked at the sky; the sun was setting and it was casting a pretty orange light on everything. She breathed out deeply and wriggled her toes in her booth, feeling the pebbles under them.

She was on the road, again.


	4. Chapter 4

I do not own LOTR movies and books. Only the OC's are mine. Sorry for any grammar mistakes. R and R!

 **Bold** : black speech.

 _Italic_ : thoughts, past events or distant conversation.

*A week later.*

After a week of walking west, she knew she had almost reached the Entwash also known as Onodlo. While she travelled, the girl made sure to always turn a bit south; she wanted to stay away from Fangorn forest. It was a place to avoid.

Now there was the problem of the River; Onodlo was quite large… Ethelred had thought it over; she was a good swimmer…she could swim to the other side, but she didn't want to soak her materials and clothing.

Well, she would see once there.

Ethelred kicked a pebble with her left foot and sighed: travelling alone for a long period of time was a lonely affair. She had followed the road at a safe distance, hidden by the thick forest. However, it was sometime difficult since there were so many vast, grasslands. The teenager had smelled the air often, making sure the wind was not carrying any threats. She hunted rabbits and other small animals…but as she progressed toward the West Emnet, they were fewer and large grazers replaced them.

At least, the temperature was clement at this time of the year since it was mid spring. She often found berries on her way…even though she was not particularly fond of them. It was better than to go hungry.

She noticed in the last 3 years that she could eat a lot more than before; the quantity of meat she could consume in one meal when she was hungry was quite impressive. The girl could tolerate hunger for a longer time too…not that she liked it.

Glancing at her surrounding, Ethelred sighed; the sun was setting and she needed to find a safe place to sleep. She walked deeper into the forest and sniffed around: grass, threes, animal shit… The wind turned her way and brought with it the smell of men and horses. The girl stiffened; by the scent they were very far…probably on the other side of Onodlo, but they were also many. It was better than Orcs, but still…The race of men hadn't been kind to her lately…once they knew what she truly was. Still, it might be her chance to head to Edoras: it was her destination and right now, she only knew she needed to head South-West. If they were going there she could follow them at a safe distance and save time or avoid losing herself.

Ethelred looked for thick threes, but found none; there were only thin birches and aspens. The girl normally climbed into one; it was safer this way as no big predator could reach her. She let herself fall on her butt; she was hungry and tired. Rabbits were scarce now and she hadn't smell deers or horses near, not even a single trace on the ground. She drank water from her skin and then proceeded to remove her bag and weapons.

The teenage curled in a tight ball on the dead leaves and dry grass, lost in thoughts. Edoras was her main goal right now; it was a large town therefore, there were many people and it meant more information. She needed help; she was human and wanted to go back that way! She had spent the winter asking around for shamans, witches…wizards. Ethelred had mainly visited old grannies that were known to prepare weird potions… They could not help her. After a few more researches, a name arrived to her ears: The Grey Wizard; Gandalf the Grey. He was known to be powerful and kind; maybe he could change her back. However, the man was also elusive… some pretended he was in Gondor, others said he was with the Elves. She even heard he was dead!

She stared at her clawed hands and probed her fangs with her tongue; these needed to go! It was freaking everyone out. Once arrived in Edoras, she would need to cover herself up with her hooded cloak…

Xxxxxx

*5 days later*

Crossing the Entwash had not been a pleasant experience. She would have thought that the water would have been warmer by now; it was mid-may! It had been icy cold and the water level was still high and the current strong. She had dragged herself out of the water and sprawled on the muddy bank, exhausted and freezing. The girl had remained there for a long time, thinking about the warm fireplace in Dernhelm's inn.

Three days after that, she caught the smell of men and horses again; they were a lot closer. Also, she knew where she was now; she was somewhere between West-Emnet and the Westfold. Sadly, she had diverted from her initial route; Edoras was almost completely south now. How did she know? She had traveled here before.

On her way, she had caught two random birds; it wasn't much of a meal, but she had been positively starving. Anyway, right now her mind was on locating the riding party and following it. She tightened her bag and weapons and began to jog rapidly through the large, rocky plains of Rohan. After two hours or so of this intensive exercise, she had reached the forest; now she could track these men without getting caught. Ethelred slowed to a walk and gulped down avidly from her waterskin. She breathed in and out deeply, satisfied with her progresses.

The scent of horses, leather and sweat was thick in the air now; it would be easy to follow. If she was lucky, they might even leave leftovers on their way… thinking of food, her stomach grumbled.

The girl shook herself and started to run again, her nose guiding her.

After hours of trotting rapidly behind the riders, she could faintly hear their voices. Ethelred stopped and climbed into a tree, trying to see how much they were.

She pulled herself up on the last branch thick enough to bear her weight and looked where the sound was coming from. They were about a dozen, maybe a little more; they were still far…about a bit less than half a mile. The girl decided that she would come closer one it was the night; some would sleep and the darkness would conceal her.

Quickly, she let herself fall from branch to branch and jumped on the ground, landing almost soundlessly.

She straightened and began to run between the trees, jumping over any obstacle. Ethelred loved running in the forest like this; she felt fast and strong, like nothing could attain her. Her long pointed ears bounced up and down with each step and the wind flew through her thick ponytail.

She continued like this until the sunset; she was very close to them now. Fires were lit among them and the smell of cooked meat reached her and made her stomach rumble. The girl whined softly; these last days of running had been tiring and she barely ate anything… She put on her cloak, took a deep breath and crept to the encampment until she could clearly hear what the men were saying. She sat in the underbrush, hidden and comfortable.

 _'' …_ _the water has flooded the entire place…''_

 _'' …_ _Orc corpses everywhere….''_

 _''_ _They also found women bodies… ''_

 _''_ _The trees did it…Have you seen them talk with one?! ''_

 _''_ _Yeah…it talked.''_

 _Ethelred cocked her head: What had been flooded? Where? Trees could speak?_

 _''_ _I've seen it myself… Isengard is_ _no more, believe me.''_

 _'' Saruman is not dead.''_

Her ears perked up and she growled: Saruman… Isengard had been…attacked by …trees? It would be no more?! What happened there? Saruman has been defeated…she did not believe it.

 _''_ _No…he locked himself up in his tower and stayed there.''_

 _''_ _You said there were women corpses there…why?''_

She heard a man snort: '' _You know why…_ ''

' _'_ _All the women that had disappeared from Rohan in the last years_ …''

Ethelred looked down; she had been there…she had seen and heard them…their screams and wails…their sobs… she had tried, tried so hard to do something and she had been beaten for it. She had been so…useless, weak.

 _''_ _No wonder this new race of Orcs looks so much like men_.'' One muttered.

The girl could practically hear them shuddering in disgust. The teenager curled in ball under her bushes; she was glad to have eavesdropped on them. This information was precious. So… that's why they were coming from Isengard… She had wondered: no one was going that way and certainly not _coming_ back. Saruman was defeated… how? He was so powerful… but she was glad, if it's was true. Then she began to worry; what of…of everyone there? There had been thousands and thousands of Uruk-hai, hundreds of Orcs and women…a lot of women…Were they all dead? It seemed impossible to her: the orcs kept getting in and out through tunnels, there were always Uruk-hai patrols outside… some must have attempted to flee. Ethelred swallowed hard: she felt bad for wishing this, but…she hoped a few were dead.

Xxxxxx

It was just dawn, but Ethelred felt rested for once; staying close to the group had made feel safe. Slowly, she stretched and rose, cracking her back and taking a few gulps of water. The girl still heard the riders and their horses; they weren't gone yet. Maybe she would have time to catch her breakfast; she smelled around for deers or rabbits, but she perceived nothing but horses. She sighed; horse meat was good… but she had a feeling that if she'd eat one of their mounts, the Rohirrims wouldn't appreciate.

She dropped herself on a large root and grumbled; she needed them to start moving before she could be on her way behind the party! However, she also needed to eat, but didn't dare hunting deeper in the forest and missing their departure.

The girl was so lost in thought, she never heard a thing.

Suddenly, something whistled in the air and she just had the time to recognize the sound and swiftly rolled away. An arrow embedded itself in the tree behind her. Ethelred eyes widened and jumped to her right, avoiding another one.

What? She never smelled a thing… wait…the wind was going toward the party…It could not have bring her any scent!

Ethelred yipped when another arrow past right besides her. She sprinted between the trees and bushes; she could now hear horses behind her! Being as she was now, she was a fast and resistant runner; but against horses… She ran for a few minutes and realized they had been herding her into a trap: another horseman appeared at her right. The teenager pushed herself harder and almost backpedaled when one more cavalier showed up in front of her.

Taking a deep breath and building up her courage, she accelerated and jumped over the horse's rear. The girl went further than she thought she would and was forced to roll on herself to not break a leg. Nonetheless, she recovered quickly and kept running.

Her lungs were burning, her legs were burning… Ethelred was tired and would not go on like this for a long time. She was hearing riders all around her; they would catch her eventually.

Two rohirrims galloped past her and abruptly turned, blocking her way. Ethelred tried to stop, but slid for a few meters. Finally unmoving, the girl panted hard. The men circled her, pointing their spears and arrows at her; the teenager began to feel scared.

'' Who are you? '' A bearded man asked.

She was glad she was still wearing her cloak on. He came closer: '' I said; WHO ARE YOU? And remove the hood! '' he ordered.

Slowly, Ethelred pulled back her hood and looked down when she heard the men gasp at her sight.

' _'_ _What is she? '' '' She's an elf?'' '' No, look at her claws! '' '' Her ears are too long to be an elf's.''_

If she could have, she would have shrunk into the ground under her. Her long pointed ears pinned themselves behind her skull and she buried her head into her shoulders.

The questioning man approached his lance to her face: '' For the last time, who are you?''

'' I-I'm Ethelred.'' She mumbled and the riders began to whisper again.

He removed his spear: '' Ethelred…you are from Rohan.''

She nodded: '' I'm from the Westfold.''

The bearded man eyed her critically: '' You are not…human aren't you? ''

The girl rubbed the back of her neck: '' Well…not exactly, but I'm part human! ''

' _'_ _She's not human?'' '' look at her fangs! '' '' I know what her other half is! '' ''I know what to do with her! ''_

Afraid, the girl took a step back and looked down again. However other horses arrived and a booming voice exclaimed: '' What is going on here!?''

Ethelred glanced up at the newcomers: there were two men, an old man clothed all of white and a horse carrying what appeared to be an elf and a dwarf behind him.

All the men nodded to the blond newcomer: '' King Théoden.''

The teenager gasped and let herself fall on her knees; King Théoden…her king. Not once in her life she would have thought she'd meet him for real!

'' It is the person that was following us; we caught this creature. ''

The king cocked his head: '' A creature you say...it looks more like a young woman to me.''

'' I assure you my Lord; she ran as fast as the horses…and look at her: she has claws and fangs.''

Ethelred shrank in herself again, humiliated by her weird appearance.

The old man spoke: '' I share your opinion, King Théoden: I see there only a girl. '' He stared at her: '' My friend here, Legolas, spotted you in a tree top yesterday and we guessed you have been following us. Why? '' He asked in a gentle voice.

'' I want to go to Edoras and I thought you were going there…so I followed.''

'' What for? '' The King demanded.

'' I need to find someone… someone who could help me with…something. '' she said softly.

Théoden smiled kindly: '' Who are you looking for? I know many of my subjects. ''

'' He's a wizard… I believed I'd find more information in a big town. He's called Gandalf.''

All the heads turned toward the elderly man wearing white.


	5. Chapter 5

I do not own LOTR movies and books. Only the OC's are mine. Sorry for any grammar mistakes. R and R!

 **Bold** : black speech.

 _Italic_ : thoughts, past events or distant conversation.

* * *

'' You are looking at him, young one.''

Her eyes almost got out of their sockets; he-he was _the_ grey wizard?

'' Why aren't you grey?'' Was the first thing she blurted out.

The dwarf laughed loudly behind the elf and Gandalf chuckled: '' I was grey, now I am Gandalf the White.''

'' Oh...alright.''

She could feel the men relaxing bit by bit around her and it relieved her of her tension.

''You seem to have a long story to tell, will you accompany me back to our camp so you can explain to me how I could help you?'' He proposed.

Ethelred glanced around then looked at the King: '' If-if I can, I mean, if it's alright.''

Théoden nodded and everyone began to head toward their camp; sadly, she could tell they were still eying her warily. They would not trust her before a while; one was still aiming at her with his bow…

'' Would you like to mount behind one of us? '' The man following Gandalf asked.

'' Horses are scared of me… I will walk.''

She did, trotting besides the Riders for a few minutes until they reached the encampment. Once there, she saw three other Men and two…children? She stared at them: they were as small as a child, but they had the face of a grown adult. The wizard saw her curiosity: '' They are called hobbit.''

'' They are like…dwarves? ''

He shook his head: '' No. Hobbits are a complete other race; smaller than the dwarves.''

The elderly man brought her to another fire a bit setback from the others. She saw that two Rohirrims had followed and were watching her. Ethelred looked at them uneasily.

'' They will not harm you: we are just making sure you are not a danger to us. ''Gandalf reassured her.

It was weird how he always seemed to know what she was thinking. The man, the elf and the dwarf had trailed after them as well. They sat on a long log and the wizard did the same; she alone remained standing.

'' Don't be shy lass; sit with us! '' The dwarf exclaimed, pulling out a pipe.

Ethelred decided to sit on the ground, closer to the elder:

'' I see a darkness into you, child. I feel how tormented you truly are even if you don't let it show.''

Mutely, she nodded.

'' How about you start by the beginning, eh? '' He offered.

It was not something she was eager to recount, but he needed to know. She took a deep breath: '' I am from Rohan, from a small village in the Westfold more exactly. I'm seventeen right now. ''

She could tell they were surprised by her young age; the girl knew she had a serious face and she was fairly tall.

'' My father raised horses, my mother was a weaver. I had two brothers and one sister older than I and a brother and a sister younger than me. When Orcs began to raid around, Father and my older brothers were called to serve and defend their lands. They would go and come back…but as time went, they came back less and less. Since I was 10, my father taught me how to shoot and so I was often hunting in the forest for my mother and younger siblings. We were becoming poorer with the raids going on and the absence of my father…I had to hunt to put more food on the table. My mother wasn't happy; she said it wasn't ladylike to wear breeches and run in the woods… ''

Ethelred peeked at her audience; they were all listening and it kind of made her shy.

'' The butcher in my village was gone with the other men as well, so I had to travelled to the next town to arrange my meat. I often hunted closer to this village, so it wasn't as long to walk there with my kill. One day, I was thirteen back then, I saw smoke in the sky… I was in the forest, but I knew it was coming from the town where the butcher was. I thought there was a barn on fire or something so I went there; help is always needed in these situations. ''

She looked down and the dwarf spoke: '' It wasn't a fire, wasn't it?''

The girl shook her head: '' No. It was not. When I arrived closer, I began to hear screams…and roars. I knew then the village was attacked by…by these beasts. Being young and foolish, I took my bow and prepared an arrow. As soon as I was close, I climbed on the rooves and hid behind a chimney. When I found the courage to look down…I-I nearly panicked; they were slaughtering almost everyone! They- they were awful… they were giant; not like the crooked Orcs from the stories. I even saw one kill a horse with one swing of its claw hand. I remember I was so afraid that my hands shook so hard I could barely launch an arrow. I missed the first shots, but after I was better. I wounded a few Orcs, maybe killed one or two. ''

Gandalf was silent, but the man accompanying him commented: '' They were Uruk-hai.''

'' Yes…And they soon found who was shooting them arrows. One of them joined me on the roof I was on and believe me; it did not take a lot of convincing to jump off of that house. I landed badly, but I wasn't hurt. I still had two arrows and I launched those at the beasts… It made them laugh. It is then I noticed it was over; the ground was covered in corpses and… there were a dozen of women huddled together and being tied up by the Uruk-hai. ''

She gulped down hard: '' Two of them had cornered me and were taunting me… there was a body besides me…and a dagger near its hand and I picked it up. The first one who tried to grab me got his hand slashed: I knew then he would hurt me this time. When he stepped toward me, I heard a huge, terrifying roar. They all stopped; all. The uruk who had roared was huge…he was the tallest of them and obviously their leader. ''

The girl frowned: '' He-he said something; but I didn't know this language and the others let him pass. He faced me and all I could think was that I was going to die. It was then that I panicked and ran to him with my little dagger; it was stupid I know. I was thirteen…how could I even think about harming him? He just toyed around with me until I had no more energy left in me. He threw me on the ground, he hit me… I did not even touch him with the blade. ''

The two Riders that had been watching her were now sitting on the ground, listening closely.

'' I was grabbed and tied: they pushed me with the other women and we began to walk.''

'' Walk where?'' One of the Rohirrims questioned.

'' To Isengard.''

The white wizard scowled: '' Saruman…''

'' Yes…him. When we arrived there, the women were taken in the pits and-and the big Uruk kept me. I remained with him for two weeks or so.''

The other Rider cocked his head: '' why? ''

Ethelred shrugged and glanced away: '' I was his… slave… Anyway, Saruman came one day… You see, he needed an army and he needed it fast. Kidnapping women and breeding them with Orcs and Uruk-hai and then using a magical process had been the quickest way for him, but he wanted to try another technique, anything that would be faster. Saruman needed someone young, but not a child either; he had tried on adults and kids and it killed them. He-he did something to me… I remember that he made me drink the Uruk's blood and did other stuff too…He said things in a loud, guttural voice….That's all I can recall from it. ''

'' What he did was forbidden! '' Gandalf rumbled on an indignant tone.

'' Whatever…I endured two days of pain and I woke up like I am now; like a monster…And he wasn't even satisfied with the result.'' She whispered.

The elf, Legolas if she remembered well, stared at her: '' You said you were thirteen…It was four years ago… Since when have you left Isengard? ''

'' hum…5 months ago.''

They all gasped and frowned: '' You stayed with them for over 3 years!? With Uruk-hai and Orcs!? '' One of the hobbits shouted.

Ethelred nodded silently.

The other half-man spoke quietly: '' How are you even alive? '' ''What did you do there?''

Her ears bent back and she muttered: '' I do not wish to speak of it.''

As if reminded of the situation and its original problem, Gandalf asked: '' …And that's why you were looking for me. You want me to change you back. You want to be fully human again.'' He deduced.

The girl looked at him with hope in her eyes, but scowled when he slowly shook his head:'' I do not know if I can undo what Saruman did: he was a powerful wizard, Ethelred.''

No, no, no: she had been searching him for so long! He was her only hope!

'' Please; try at least! Look at me: everyone is scared of me! No one wants to talk to me, no one wants to come near me! The only place who had accepted me they did because I hid my true nature! I never once did anything to them and the second they learned what I was they turned their backs on me! '' She pleaded in a harsh, desperate voice.

Seeing the looks of pity from those around her, she quickly calmed herself and sat back.

'' I will do what I can… I will try, I promise you.''

The dwarf cleared his throat: '' But…don't you have family in Rohan? You told us you did.''

This, was something else too…

'' My own mother rejected me… I don't know if my father and my older brothers are still alive because of the war… '' She trailed off not wanting to give details about the first statement. These three years…Ethelred simply wanted to forget them. To erase them from her mind forever.

The white wizard sighed: '' We leave in half an hour; the city is a day and a half away. Come with us. I will have more material at my disposal in Edoras.'' He gave her a critical once-over: '' you need a change of clothes and a proper meal, too.''

Hearing the word meal, her head perked up: '' Actually…do you have any meat? I haven't eaten in days…''

The Rohirrim sitting closest to her nodded: '' We have a few stripes of a deer we caught 2 days ago. ''

'' Could I have some? '' She asked.

The man began to rose: '' Of course; it's raw though .''

'' It won't be a problem.'' She mumbled.

He came back a few minutes later with a leather package and gave it to her: she almost cried of happiness when she opened it: a bloody pound of venison was in it!

Ethelred grabbed up a stripe and bit into it, making the meat juice run along her jaw. Immediately, she noticed the two hobbits did not look so well and she picked up the scent of fear from them.

She swallowed and asked: '' why are you two afraid? I don't eat…hobbits you know. I can't help my taste for raw meat; that's what I like now. ''

It was the man sitting with the elf and dwarf who spoke: '' They were captured by Uruk-Hai… I guess you did something that reminded them of their time with the Orcs.''

She gave them an apologetic look: ''I- I'm sorry…I know it must have been hard for you.''

A bit later, she saw Gandalf rise and go to King Théoden; he whispered something to him and the King appeared to be horrified. Ethelred sighed; he must be telling him her lamentable story. The Rohirrim then looked at her and back to the wizard and nodded.

This, was going to be an interesting travel.

Xxxxxx

*POV Switch*

''…Pizdur? ''

'' **Don't call me that. I'm your leader, not an officer. Not anymore**.'' A gravelly voice said roughly.

The tall Uruk turned away from the maps on the rock in front of him.

'' **Chief, the group of Orcs you sent in the East Emnet just arrived…they said they had important information to deliver you**. '' his subordinate told him.

'' **Fetch them**.'' He ordered.

The other Uruk bowed his head to him and quickly did as he was told. Mauthak rumbled deeply in his chest, pleased the little squad he sent came back. He only dispatched Orcs this time because they tended to be more discreet than Uruk-hai and they also were better on Wargs. The leader accepted them here; they were few now and any ally was welcomed. There were even of few goblins among them.

Three, lanky Orcs appeared, each one of them uglier than the other. They respectfuly nodded to him and the smallest one walked forward.

The ex-Pizdûr drawled: '' **Speak**.''

'' **We found the village Ugnag talked about.** ''

Mauthak's pointed ears flicked: '' **Go on**.''

'' **She was with them, but she also left; clever little thing she is.** '' He said with his twangy voice.

The male growled deeply: '' **Where?** ''

He shrugged his shoulders: '' **We interrogated the humans there…one said she left, heading West**.''

A second Orc with dangling ears joined in: '' **We found her traces; we followed, but the female pushed herself hard and crossed the great river before us. We had to skirt higher where it was shallow.** ''

The small orc spoke again: '' **we tracked her again…that lass is a hard one to follow; she doesn't let no trace behind, doesn't light fires… she hid and barely slept…** ''

Mauthak narrowed his yellow, feline eyes and huffed; that he knew. The Kalsak must be tired and weak now… And he knew the vast prairies of Rohan were desolated of any food… He rumbled lowly again, making the Orcs shake in front of him.

''… **But, we know she was running hard toward the South afterward…** ''

'' **…** **And why is she not with you, now?** '' He asked harshly, showing his sharp teeth.

The other orc rubbed the back of his neck: '' **Men.** ''

The trio nodded vigorously as if this one word was explaining everything.

'' **Men, you say… has she joined the white skins?** ''

They all looked at each other like they were checking for a general consensus then the small orc nodded.

Mauthak roared loudly and swung his hand in a bear-like way at the nearest thing which was an old barrel: it exploded in multiple pieces. The orcs cowered and he roared again toward them: '' **OUT!** ''

They did not need to be told twice and they scurried away. The Uruk tried to calm himself and took long, deep breath.

''Someone's upset.'' A deep voice said in Westron.

Mauthak abruptly turned toward it: there stood his second, his arms crossed over his chest and leaning casually against the wall. They very much looked alike minus a few differences. He always wore his long hair in a half ponytail, low behind his head while the intruder always as his in a full one. They shared similar features besides the nose and the eyes color. The leader was a bit taller as well.

''Lughorn.'' He grumbled.

The other male gave him a large fanged, grin: '' Who else? You reek of anger.'' He pointed, wrinkling his nose.

Mauthak only growled again, looking away and Lughorn became serious: '' It's about Vogal? ''

'' She's with Men.''

Lughorn remained unaffected: '' Maybe it's best for her—''

The Chief snarled, clenching his fists: '' –Best for her? Men have harmed her in the past! Men have rejected her! She doesn't belong with them! The Kalsak is like you and me; not them! ''

His second gave him a sad glance: '' I want her back too, Mauthak. I know she's your female… but she left; she wanted to leave. She was unhappy with us; with you… And she's been harmed by us too, _you_ _know_.''

The great Uruk shook his head: '' We are not in Isengard anymore; life will change for us and we are going to establish ourselves in the Rhûn. I won't leave without my _Shok_.''

xxxxxx

 **Kalsak** : fang

 **Vogal** : small

 **Shok** : mate

* * *

A/N: P.S.- leave a Review; let me know what you think! ;P


	6. Chapter 6

I do not own LOTR movies and books. Only the OC's are mine. Sorry for any grammar mistakes. R and R!

 **Bold** : black speech.

 _Italic_ : thoughts, past events or distant conversation.

* * *

Ethelred ran besides the horses, it felt right to run alongside them and not _from_ them. The man called Aragorn was keeping her weapons and her bag with him on his mount. It was easier to run that way, her movements unrestrained. Luckily, the horses were trotting and not galloping. They would arrive in one hour or two and nervousness was slowly invading her. The race of Men's reactions to her always had been… different and various.

Fear. Curiosity. Disgust.

The girl jumped on a large rock and hoped down quickly, keeping her speed. She heard the Gimli whistled from behind the elf: '' Look at her; she runs like it did not exhaust her in the slightest! You move like a big cat from the mountains! ''

The teenager looked at him and kept running: '' I am…am tired…master …Dwarf.'' She panted hard.

'' You're a strong lass; we're almost there. '' He encouraged her.

Ethelred liked the dwarf; he was kind to her and not afraid at all. The elf on the other was colder to her… but she did not blame him for his reserved attitude. Aragorn was polite to her, but not as friendly as Gimli.

She glanced on her right, where the white wizard was; he was observing her…He always seemed to do so and she wondered why. The girl gave him a knowing look, but the elder only smiled.

The wizard looked at her; something was wrong with this child, yes child. She was only seventeen and her soul felt even younger to him; the girl was kind hearted and eager to provide help when it was needed. He felt also darkness…deep inside her. It was in the back of her feline eyes, it was in the way she kept glancing around in the horizon. In the flicks of her long ears… The girl was scared, but scared of what exactly? She was with them, Isengard was flooded and Saruman powerless…

Gandalf perfectly saw what she was; her orc side was showing up all the time. The way she could run for hours besides them…how high she jumped…the bloody meat she ate… How she smelled the air all the time; the wizard's mind was screaming _uruk-hai_ to him.

 _''_ _I do not wish to speak of it…''_

That's what she had said…Gandalf knew she hadn't told them everything.

Ethelred plunged her head in the water cistern reserved for the horses and drank until her belly ache then let herself fall on her back besides it. She heard a few men laughing, quickly joined by the Hobbits and the Dwarf.

Never again. No. She would never run like this for so long without breaks. She was a fast runner, but not for so long. She had stamina, but not when she was running that fast.

Her legs ached and her lungs felt as though they were burning from the inside. The teenager shook her head, sending water everywhere and grinned at the Hobbits: '' It is good to finally be here! ''

The girl rose and looked around. The horsemen were mostly surrounding her, keeping the villagers from seeing her fully. Ethelred put her hood up, not wanting to take any chance. She saw Gandalf approaching her: '' Ethelred? Come; we'll go inside… the King has a place for us to sleep.'' He said, placing a hand on her shoulder.

'' Oh…it's kind of him.''

The Rohirrims and some squires brought the horses to stables and the rest of them followed the King inside his place.

The girl climbed the long stairs leading them to the… palace, if she could call the longhouse that, she looked to the left and the right, mesmerized by the place. It was beautiful…not once she thought she'd be in Edoras. Not once she thought she'd enter the King's house.

Once inside, she was even more captivated; it was beautiful and it felt welcoming. The building was spacious, the ceiling was high… She felt safe here, but not trapped.

'' We will all sleep in the mess hall, is that alright with you? '' The wizard informed her, pulling her out of her thoughts.

She nodded to him and suddenly stopped, her ears going straight on her head. That smell…she knew that familiar smell. The girl slowly turned her head toward the scent, glad she was still wearing her hood.

 _Father_ …

There he stood, conversing with another Rohirrim. Her eyes widened; war and time had barely changed him safe for a scar running from his left cheek bone to his jaw. It must have been a deep wound…she could see it through his beard. His light, brown hair was tied in a loose ponytail and he was wearing leather wrist-guards as well as his chainmail. He looked healthy enough.

Since she was little, she always had been told that she looked exactly like him. Her grandmother even told her that at the same age, there was barely any difference beside their gender. The teenager always had been close to her father; he was a good man, serious and gentle at the same time.

Ethelred's heart tightened; she badly wanted to go to him…to tell her dad how much she had missed him and to hug him. The girl sighed; she also feared his reaction to her… Her father must have come back home at least a few times in the last 4 years…Ethelred did not know what her mother told him.

He might even think she was dead and probably did… It was the logic thing to believe; she had been taken by Uruk-hai almost 4 years ago…

The man must have felt he was being observed because he turned toward her; she quickly avoided his stare. Evidently, Gandalf noticed: '' You know this rider? '' he said, pointing at her father.

The girl quickly nodded.

He smiled kindly: '' Shouldn't you go salute him? ''

Again, she rapidly shook her head, disagreeing with the idea.

The wizard frowned: '' If it's a problem to you, I can go talk to him, if you want. I'm certain any man from your hometown would be glad to know you are alive and well.''

'' I wouldn't say that I'm alive _and well_ …'' She grumbled.

He patted her shoulder: '' you're sure? ''

'' Hum. If you go speak to this man and mention my name, he'll most likely throw a fit. You better not.'' She warned him and walked off, indicating this discussion was over.

Xxxxxx

She woke up well rested the next morning, even though one of the hobbits had caused trouble during the night. Ethelred snorted; you don't play with Saruman's toys no matter how much you feel drawn to them. Well, lesson learned for the small man.

It felt good to sleep inside again, to feel safe. Spending the night here was more relaxing than one alone in the forest or hidden between two rocks in the Rohan prairies.

The girl stretched with a yawn; most of the people in the hall were still sleeping. She decided to go outside, but went to use the privy before. Ethelred grabbed her cloak and walked to the second floor, careful to be silent as she traveled the small palace.

She finally found a door leading outside on a large balcony. The rising sun caught her eyes with its beauty and she decided to watch it for a moment. The girl leaned on the hard railing and breathed deeply in the morning's fresh air.

A few minutes later, someone joined her and she knew who it was.

'' Beautiful isn't it?''

She nodded quietly under her hood and there was a silent pause between them.

The man talked again: '' I saw you watching me yesterday. You were not with the wizard and Lord Aragorn before…'' he said.

She shook her head and saw him scowled: '' Are you mute? ''

'' No. '' she mumbled.

She didn't want to talk too much, afraid he would perhaps recognize her.

Her feminine voice startled her father: '' You're a woman? You should put down your hood… everyone will mistake you for man. ''

She shrugged, showing him she wasn't caring; He glanced at her and smiled, shrugging too. '' I see you're not a talker: I'll leave you be.''

The girl watched him go with a heavy heart, wishing she could run after him.

Xxxxxx

Ethelred held two handmaids at arm length, trying to prevent them from divesting her in one of the bathrooms.

'' We have been ordered to help you clean yourself!'' '' You need a bath!'' the pair explained.

'' I know I need a bath, but I don't need help to clean myself! '' She protested, adding a leg to push away the taller girl.

'' We saw your long hair: we will wash them and brush them!'' '' It must be full of tangles!''

'' I want to take my bath alone: I don't need you. Have a day off, I don't care! '' She groaned.

The door opened and the white wizard came in, raising a brow: '' Giving the girls trouble?''

'' M'lord! '' '' She won't let us do our job!''

Ethelred angrily turned to them: '' I can bath alone! '' The girl rolled her eyes, removed her hood and roared loudly, showing her long fangs. It stunned the wenches for a second then one of them started to scream and the two girls scurried out of the rooms. The teenager grinned, satisfies with her handiwork, while Gandalf shook his head.

'' Handmaids are the ones who gossip the most, Ethelred: you're cover won't last for much longer.''

Ah. She had not thought of that.

'' well, I will bath now.''

The elderly man nodded and headed outside: '' Come to me after; I will see what I can do for your…situation.''

Xxxxxx

This bath had really been needed; the water had turned brown along the way! Ethelred had scrubbed her skin raw until it turned pink; even her claws were cleaned! The girl was sure she would be shining if she'd look at herself in a mirror.

Other maids had brought her fresh clothes and for once they immediately arrived with breeches and a tunic instead of a gown. It had been a pleasant surprise.

The teenager stood in front of a wooden door knowing Gandalf was waiting for her on the other side. She knocked and swiftly entered in the room.

Ethelred was surprised to see Aragorn there and she frowned.

''Do not fret dear; Aragorn here is an excellent healer. I thought he could help.'' The wizard explained her.

She groaned; she had wanted the minimum number of person present…

Gandalf made a beckoning gesture, silently telling her to sit on the table in front of him. She did, hopping on it.

'' Before we start, do you have any injury I should know of?'' Aragorn asked.

'' Well…one of my shoulders was badly clawed…but it's mostly healed now. '' She said.

Gandalf frowned: '' Show us.''

The girl internally groaned: '' I'd rather not.'' She didn't want to remove her tunic and shirt; they would see…

'' Have anyone looked to it at all?''

She rolled her eyes: ''Me.'' ''Listen: that's not why I came here. ''

'' Are you shy or just stubborn? '' The younger man grumbled.

Tired of the glares they were giving her, she roughly removed her tunic and shirt, glad she was wearing her leather straps over her chest.

'' See? It wasn't that—''Aragorn began.

Both men fell silent when she quickly turned her back to them.

 _Yes. That's what my back looks like. You wanted to see? Have a look_! She sneered in her head, knowing they were certainly disgusted by now.

She stared with hard eyes at the wall facing her, waiting for them to say something. There were at least 5 or 6 biting marks on her neck, shoulders and upper back. It was easy to see they were not human bites.

'' How-how did it happen?'' The dark haired man demanded.

She sighed: '' Don't be stupid; you know how it happened.''

Just by the look they were giving her, she knew they knew.

It was Gandalf who tried first to dissipate the uneasiness among them: '' You were right…your shoulder appears to be healing quite well. What clawed you?''

'' I know, I told you it was healed. An Uruk did that.'' She curtly answered.

The white wizard walked in front of her and began examining her.

'' How do you feel since you are in this…state? ''

'' Physically? Quite alright I must say. ''

Aragorn cocked it head: '' Nothing wrong?''

'' To be honest, I've never felt better than since I'm half Orc. I'm stronger, faster, I have more stamina…the only thing that disturbs me are my hearing and sense of smell: it's too much sometimes. The noises and scents can be really annoying.''

Both men checked her eyes, ears, claws….they took her pulse, they asked her to breathe deeply… Gandalf finally placed one of his hand on her chest and the other on her stomach and asked to lie down.

'' I still don't think I can make you the way you were before… but I sense a darkness running inside of you… I will try to take it out. We'll see if it changes you back…It might hurt. '' He informed her.

Aragorn stood still besides them as the wizard began to mumble in a strange language. She didn't feel anything at the start, then it itches then it became painful… She growled lowly and glare at Gandalf. Ethelred felt as if her internal organs were constricted…then it became unbearable and she roared in pain. The white man kept chanting and mumbling and the teenager finally passed out.

XXXXXX

Mauthak fell to his knees and gripped his chest, gasping. At least, they were surrounded by a thick forest, so his people would not see him in this state. Lughorn, who was hunting with him, trotted rapidly to him.

'' **What's going on? Are you okay?** '' He asked, placing a hand on his friend's shoulder.

The big uruk growled and swallowed with difficulty: '' **She-she hurts…** ''

He groaned loudly again and Lughorn frowned, worried: '' **Is she…dead?** ''

Mauthak shook his head: '' **no…I could never feel it when Thin-Fang was hurt… It's different this time. She's hurting, but it's different**.'' He explained, then suddenly, the pain was gone from his chest.

He released a long sigh of relief and rose; his second stared at him: '' **what do we do, now?** ''

The captain scowled and rumbled: '' **we find her and we get her.** ''


	7. Chapter 7

I do not own LOTR movies and books. Only the OC's are mine. Sorry for any grammar mistakes. R and R!

 **Bold** : black speech.

 _Italic_ : thoughts, past events or distant conversation

* * *

Slowly, Ethelred opened her eyes; she felt sore and tired. Looking around, she saw Gandalf sitting in a corner with Aragorn and King Théoden was surprisingly there as well.

The girl sat with a groan and the men rushed to her: '' How do you feel?'' the wizard asked.

She rubbed her forehead and her hand moved to her ears; still long and pointy: '' I'm alright… Guess it didn't work eh? '' she said flatly.

The pair slowly shook their heads with an aggravated air. The girl turned to the King: '' My Lord…why are you here?''

'' Half the castle could hear your…roars, but none dared come in here and I was curious.'' He explained uneasily.

Her shoulders sagged; all of this for nothing. She had searched, asked, demanded, waited… and finally found the wizard; only to discover that she would not be fully human again. She slowly rose and put her tunic and cloak back on under the men's stares and walked to the door.

'' Thanks Gandalf for trying and you too m'lord Aragorn. '' She lightly bowed; ''My King.'' She whispered and went outside.

Xxxxxx

The teenager sat at the table's edge, emptying in one shot the big mug of beer she had been working on. She was stuck that way… she would probably never return home and be with her people. Humans will always look at her with fear and disgust for the rest of her life.

'' Don't look so grim, lass.''

She did not even turn her head to see Gimli approaching and sitting beside her.

'' Master dwarf…you're not the one who will look like a monster for the rest of your life.'' She said, grabbing the nearest drink lying around.

'' You don't look like these orcs…you don't look like a monster at all: I'm sure if you go back home, you'll be fine.'' He tried to comfort her with a few taps on her back.

'' I already told you… I tried that and my mother cried at the sight of me. She screamed and told me to never come back.'' She mumbled from under her hood.

'' I remember: that was your _mom'_ s reaction. You have a father…and brothers you said; you need to speak to them.''

She gulped down a few mouthful of alcohol: '' Yeah? What if they reject me too? I don't want to see their horrified faces, I don't want to hear their harsh words!''

The dwarf shook his head: '' It is a possibility… but if you don't go to them you'll never know. You can't give up because you're afraid they won't react well. You can't give up because you're afraid to be hurt.''

Gimli was probably right…not that she will listen to him, but it made her think on it. Only her mother had seen her after her…transformation. Furthermore, her and her mother never went along…perhaps it would go better with her father and brothers?

Unconsciously, her eyes sought her father, who was sitting and conversing on the other side of the mess hall. The girl frowned; the man looked serious and was obviously having an argument with one of his fellows. The other rider pushed him violently and her father recoiled.

Ethelred rose and began to walk over there, ignoring Gimli who was calling her, confused by what was happening. She watched her dad answer in the same way, but her eyes traveled on her right: another man was sneaking on him from behind, a dagger in his hand.

Quickly, she moved to stand between them and grabbed the arm holding the weapon, surprising everyone around: '' You touch one hair of his head and I kill you.'' She growled lowly.

Her father turned around, astonished; his eyes widened even more when he saw the other man holding a dagger. He probably never thought a fellow rider would want to seriously injure him. Ethelred clenched the man's wrist so hard he whimpered and let the blade fall.

She turned to her father, suddenly angry: '' Don't be so careless with your life; anyone could have gotten you from behind! You have a family waiting for you, damn it!'' she said harshly.

Everyone had stopped around, watching them curiously. Time stood still and the girl finally pushed her way out of the circle of men surrounding them.

Xxxxxx

The girl stood on the balcony breathing to night's fresh air to cool down. She was pacing rapidly, growling and huffing like an angry bear; she could not help it… Fighting, blood and hunting… was making her wild; she felt ready to burst with her unspent energy. Plus, she still wanted to attack these men for trying to harm her father. Gimli had followed her and was trying to calm her down, patting her back.

'' Breath; breathing is the key! '' He said hurriedly, probably nervous at the sight of her state.

'' It doesn't work that way, Dwarf! It is not so easily done! '' She growled.

She knew he was right though and she breathed in deeply, leaning on the rampart.

''There, there… how are you feeling now?''

'' better…thank you.'' She grumbled.

'' You know this man? The one you protected, I mean.''

She was about to answer when to door leading to the balcony burst open: '' Why did you interfere woman?! It was none of your businesses!''

Her father came shouting toward her and she twirled around, roaring loudly in response to his aggressive behavior. It shut him up and Gimli attempted to calm him: '' Rider, she only tried to protect you; she had seen the man coming with a dagger toward you…''

'' You were watching me? What for?'' he asked incredulously.

She turned to Gimli: '' Master Dwarf…I will ask you to leave, please.''

He slowly nodded and went inside while she and he rider observed each other.

'' Baldred…'' she trailed off.

The man took a step back: '' How do you know my name?''

The girl sighed and thought of what Gimli told her as she removed her hood and looked at her father.

His eyes widened and his mouth opened slightly, but before he could say anything she began to babble: '' I-I know…I look like a monster, but it's me. Stuff happened and-''

He narrowed his eyes as if he couldn't believe what they were showing him: ''Ethelred?''

She rubbed the back of her neck, embarrassed and nervous: '' Yeah…it's been a while eh?'' She said, trying to be casual about it and preparing herself for his reactions to come.

Baldred stepped toward her: '' My child… ''

She found it took him time to comprehend everything; he seemed to be in shock or something: '' Yes; your fourth one.'' She joked lamely.

The girl didn't have time to register anything that he was on her, hugging the life out off her: '' My daughter… I-I, they told me you were-re de-dead, that-at _they_ took you-ou.'' He sobbed loudly in her hair.

After a moment, she embraced him back. The man released her and grabbed her face, inspecting her body: '' you've grown so much…you're not a child anymore…What-what happened to you? '' he said brokenly.

'' Hell happened to me… Why did you think I was dead?''

He wiped his cheeks: '' Your mother told me you were.''

It did not surprise her. There was a silent pause and he abruptly broke down again, letting himself fall on his knees.

'' I did not even look for you! '' He confessed as he hid his face in his hands while his shoulders shook.

She placed a hand in his back: '' Dad…'' It felt good to call him like that. ''…It's not your fault; you couldn't have done anything anyway.'' She said with a tight throat.

The situation was about to make her cry; she remembered how close they were to each other… even though she was a girl, he taught her many things; how to use a bow, an axe to split the wood, to ride… Baldred had dragged her everywhere with him around the village, to her mother's despair. Of all his children, she was the one who looked the most like him…

'' I-I missed you Dad… I thought a lot about you all when I was…when I was gone.''

He finally glanced back at her and rose to his feet to pull her against him again. She let him; the sensation of being held by someone so dear to her was welcomed. The man grabbed her shoulders and took her in at arm length: '' Tell me….tell me what's happened Ethelred.''

She shook her head: '' It's the past, Father; it is not a good memory or one I wish to share with you.'' She gently said.

Xxxxxx

'' **My brother…do you even know where we are heading?** '' Lughorn asked from his warg.

They had been travelling in the forest and through the plains for a few days now and they were currently in the woods. Mauthak had taken 45 of his best warriors with him and a few orcs; they left about over 150 Uruk-hai, human females, orcs and goblins behind in Dol Guldur.

'' **I do know and I know it's dangerous, but the scouts told me she was with the horse lords king**. '' he grunted.

'' **Are you planning on taking the city or what? We're barely 60**!''

He shook his head: '' **There is a war going on brother; the Riders won't stay for long in the town. Then I'll go get her**.''

Lughorn twisted on his mount: '' **What if she follows them, hum?** ''

The Pizdûr gave him a flat look: ' **' If you do not wish to come, go back to Dol Guldur.** '' He growled sharply at his negative attitude. '' **.. .And no; she won't follow them. The Kalsak hates fighting and war. She will do anything to avoid it**. ''

His second hummed and they remained silent for a moment until he asked: '' **Why do you think she left? Besides the obvious I mean.** ''

Mauthak shrugged: '' **She hated that place**. ''

'' **Do you think she had a feeling about what was about to happen to Isengard?** ''

'' **Nah. She would have warned someone; her heart is too soft to abandon people to this fate. No…In the beginning, I thought she had escaped because…because she was carrying my child**. '' He confessed.

Lughorn straightened on his warg: '' **you think Vogalurz is pregnant!?** ''

'' **No! I've said '** ** _I thought'_** **. Ugnag would have mentioned it to me…a six or seven months pregnancy can't be hidden…and they fought together.** '' He explained.

His second's mount snorted and he patted his neck: '' **You truly believe the female would have left in that state? The Kalsak is young, but not one to act impulsively; she always thinks about her next move. She plans**.''

'' **Yeah… I know you're right, but planning like she does, she would not want a child in that awful place that was Isengard… And she's never had fate in me: she never believed, not once, that I hated that place too and that I wanted out. With her**. ''

Lughorn gave him a bored, unsurprised look: '' **Well, you're to blame for that: you weren't exactly the perfect companion…** '' he trailed off.

Mauthak snorted: '' **That female didn't give me a chance or a choice; she was pigheaded and unruly. How was I supposed to keep her in line? How was I supposed to keep us discreet under the Wizard stare? Others always questioned me about her… They thought I was going soft**. ''

'' **I like Vogalurz; she is different**.'' He protested, trying to defend her.

'' **No shit you like her; you tried to mate with her**.'' He said bitterly.

'' … **And she clawed my face that time… and you beated me for it! I just…misunderstood her! She was sending mixed signals**!''

Mauthak reached to his left to punch his second's shoulder. '' **Every single female walking this country is sending you mixed signals then!** ''

Lughorn burst out in laughs: '' **They can't resist me! By the way, can we bring a few more with us? Maybe we could stop by a village or two, you know…** '' he trailed off.

The leader shook his head: '' **Is this all you think about? We will see…I don't want to fight with Men.** ''

'' **Pfft! Say the male who's actually travelling miles to get** ** _one_** **female! And you know we need them; we're too many males…and you're planning on rebuilding our clan, our race…** ''

'' **You're right… but we need to consult others: it's not a decision that must be taken by us two.** ''


	8. Chapter 8

I do not own LOTR movies and books. Only the OC's are mine. Sorry for any grammar mistakes. R and R!

 **Bold** : black speech.

 _Italic_ : thoughts, past events or distant conversation.

* * *

'' You make so much noise; it's awful.'' She grunted.

Her father exhaled and straightened: '' The deers won't hear me.''

'' Oh…they will. You're as loud as a mummakil. ''

He gave her an indignant look: '' I am completely silent!'' He hissed.

''Believe me, when you're completely silent, I'll tell you.''

Her father grunted something and they kept walking deeper in the forest, looking for preys. Ethelred had smelt something and she was sure some deers weren't so far. The girl greatly enjoyed this time with her father however, she couldn't help but think he was… well, he was very much human. He was loud and slow and couldn't smell a damn thing! She saw or heard every rabbit, squirrel and other small animals nearby while he did not even notice.

The half breed was certain it took them twice the time it would have taken her had she been alone. She chuckled silently as she watched his red face and heard his short breathe; he had insisted about carrying the beast.

They had been silent for some time when Baldred turned to her: '' My daughter… Will you tell me why your mother said you were dead? '' he asked on a hushed tone.

Looking down, the girl thought that she could tell him.

'' Father…look at me… I have fangs and claws…my ears are long and pointy; see how my eyes are now like ones of a cat? Mother was scared… and she reacted to me in her own way. ''

'' You mostly look human, Ethelred: it's not that bad or frightening you know.'' He said to comfort her.

'' Maybe for you, a courageous man. Mother knew I had been taken by them; I guess she didn't want to face this and the reality of what it implied for me. Perhaps she was ashamed.'' She murmured.

Baldred looked confused: '' …But, you told me it's been two years since you went back home and then you say you only left Isengard…6 months ago. ''

She nodded: '' I escaped once they brought me out…I immediately went to our village.''

'' They captured you again?''

'' No…they simply…found me in the state I was back then.'' She grumbled.

He cocked his head: '' The state you were?''

'' Yeah… I was a broken mess: my own mother rejected me and the neighbors had not been better. They were so afraid. I got it then, that humans would always and forever be scared or hateful toward me. That I could never live fully in our community again.''

''Are you telling me you _went_ with them?'' he asked incredulously.

She glared at him: '' Don't judge me: I was fifteen and I had nowhere to go…I understood later that it had not been the best choice.''

Xxxxxx

2 years and a half ago

 _Ethelred bent over the stream and stared at herself with disgust before erasing the reflection with a quick hand through the water. She sat back and hugged herself tightly before angrily wiping her tears away. She recalled her mother's terrified stare and screams thrown at her._

 _Her ears flicked to the side and she knew she was not alone anymore when a familiar scent hit her nose. The girl hugged herself tighter and waited for the heavy yet silent steps to come closer._

 _''_ _ **What did I tell you?**_ _'' a deep, rumbling voice asked._

 _She wasn't fluent yet in Black Speech, but she understood enough. Ethelred didn't answer, but her long pointy ears plastered themselves to her head._

 _The big male behind her kept talking: ''_ _ **I told you the white faces would not react well to you…You could have been killed! And did you seriously think I would not find you?**_ _''_

 _The young woman's throat constricted; everything about him was saying 'danger'. His smell, his voice, his look…The Uruk scared her. He let out a growl when she remained quietly on the ground there._

 _She abruptly rose and turned to face him: ''_ _ **I needed to know! I thought…my family**_ _…'' She trailed off._

 _Mauthak showed her his large fangs, displeased: ''_ _ **see what happened? You disobeyed my orders and you flee; I could kill you for this!**_ _''_

 _Ethelred blanched; she never thought about that…she was only thinking of going back home. Her head tried to hide itself in her shoulders and her ears bent backward._

 _All of sudden, he grabbed her, pulled her back roughly against his chest and began to sniff her. She felt his blunt nose against her hair and rubbing against her long ears. Knowing she could not oppose herself to him and his wishes, she tried to remain calm in his grip._

 _The male verified if she had been touched by another and checked for injuries. Satisfied with the results, he pulled her with him away from the creek. The young girl didn't care that he was most likely bringing her toward a group of Uruk-Hai; she felt numb inside. What mattered before did not seem to matter as much now._

 _What was she living for anyway? Her own people did not want her… all humans would look at her with fright and mistrust. Before, she fought to free herself and go back home… now she had no reason to fight or to wish to be away from them; they were probably the only ones who would accept her._

 _That night, Mauthak pulled her away from the campfires and the group and took her with more force than she thought was necessary. Afterward, he remained above her, breathing hard; he licked the blood who was slowly pouring out of his bite on her neck and rumbled: ''_ _ **Don't ever run from me again.**_ _''_

Xxxxxx

Her father's voice pulled her out of the memory: '' You went away for a moment, my daughter. ''

'' Sorry, I was only thinking.'' She mumbled.

Baldred shifted the animal on his shoulder: '' So… you willingly went with them after?''

'' Yeah, kind of. '' She nodded.

The man gave her a troubled look and remained silent as they walked back to the castle.

Xxxxxx

''… **humans don't bite**.'' Lughorn informed him.

Mauthak raised a brow: ' **'because you're such an expert now? Not even while mating?** ''

'' **Not even while mating…And yes, among us, I could be considered an expert: I even** ** _convinced_** **a white skin female to lay with me once!** ''

' **'** **That's bullshit**. '' the leader said.

Another Uruk shouted close by: '' **Yeah, you're talking shit Lughorn!** ''

The second in command raised his hands in a defensive manner: '' **Okay, okay: she didn't want me…At the beginning! Nonetheless, I've given her pleasure!** '' He explained, puffing his chest.

'' **I call that bullshit as well**.'' Their companion groaned. '' **I've given my female pleasure… sometimes**.'' Mauthak mumbled.

The two males riding beside him straightened: '' **Really?** '' ' **'To Vogal?** ''

The leader's eyes seemed far away as he stared ahead: ' **' When… when she wasn't fighting with me; I could go slow and be…gentle. These times she found pleasure…afterward she was calm and peaceful; she slept.** '' he explained softly.

Just a glance at Lughorn and Mauthak knew his second understood what he was talking about. His lieutenant had always been different about these things. He never tried to hurt the females he took, he even tried to talked with them; not that it helped him much.

'' **Hum…this is interesting; tell us more**. '' the other Uruk asked.

The leader shook his head, sending his long mane flowing from left to right: **''nay, enough of female talk** : **we must plan!** ''

He curled his fingers in the warg' thick fur and dug his heels in his flanks, sending their party at great speed through the forest.

Xxxxxx

Days later, the Gondor called for help; the fires were lightened.

Her heart tightened in her chest as she watched the Riders getting ready for war. She just found her father that she was losing him again. Ethelred thought a lot lately; she wouldn't linger in Edoras…people were wary around her. She would not go home either… she was beginning to think of a secluded place in the mountains or the forest maybe…not too far from a village to be able to get necessary supplies there. There she could live in peace and hunt…it would be a solitary life, but it would be acceptable.

'' You could accompany us to the meeting point if you wish, daughter.'' Her dad informed her as he stepped beside her.

She shook her head: '' The Riders are not too fond of me: I'll stay here for a while.''

Baldred cocked his head: '' For a while?''

She stared at him with sad eyes: ''I will leave Edoras, father.''

The man appeared confused: '' …To go back to our village?'' he said tentatively.

''No. I'm _leaving_.'' She drawled slowly.

'' But-''

She cut him off: '' Father; I won't be accepted back home and my place is not among the Men anymore.''

Distressed, he asked: '' Where will you go?''

She shrugged: '' Away from the Rohirrims and everyone. ''

Her father grabbed her shoulders: '' Ethelred…I-I love you: you're my daughter, when I come back from the war—''

She turned her head away when he mentioned coming back from war.

His eyes became soft and he understood: ''-You don't think I will come back from this… that I will survive.'' He stated.

The girl gripped his wrist and squeezed it gently: '' I'm realist father: I know the risks of going to war. I'm not saying you will die, but I very well know the possibility of it. I will not wait here for some rider to tell me of your death; I would live in constant state of panic and it will kill me slowly. In a few weeks I will leave this town.''

The Rohirrim looked desperate: '' How-how will I find you after the war?''

'' don't worry about this now; you have important things to do and I want you to stay focus on what lies ahead of you, Father.''

Xxxxxx

'' … **The horse lords left 4 days ago, Pizdûr.** '' His scout told him.

'' **Is there any Riders left?** ''

The orcs shook his head: '' **There are a few men guarding the great door and the walls, but those I've seen were rather old or young looking**.''

Mauthak nodded: '' **They wouldn't left the city completely unprotected, but they needed the strong men for the war. It will be easy**.''

'' **The town is surrounded by walls…** ''

Lughorn shrugged beside them: '' **We have hooks and ropes…and claws**.'' He grinned.

They all nodded quietly.

'' **I need to set a few rules, then we can begin to ride toward Edoras**.'' Mauthak growled.


	9. Chapter 9

I do not own LOTR movies and books. Only the OC's are mine. Sorry for any grammar mistakes. R and R!

 **Bold** : black speech.

 _Italic_ : thoughts, past events or distant conversation.

* * *

Ethelred was lying in bed, staring at the stones of the ceiling. Her father had gone to war a few days ago and it left her feeling sad and empty. The girl had tried to harden her heart; she had spent the last 3 years without her family…a month or two would not kill her right? She could do this easily…

The young woman had told Baldred she'd leave and wouldn't wait for him; now, she wasn't so sure about her decision. Finding an isolated spot in the forest or a mountain to make her home didn't appeal much to her beside the fact that she would live in peace and could hunt. However, the people of Edoras, like everywhere she had been lately, didn't particularly appreciate her. They avoided her or glanced at her from afar… Few were speaking to her or interacting with her.

The women and children were scared and the men left in Edoras were distrustful of her.

She had no place here.

Ethelred finally sat in her bed: the sun was not rising yet… she often didn't need to sleep much now. Most of the time, she could sleep between 4 or 7 hours and it suited her just fine. Other times, she could spend the whole day sleeping if she needed rest…her body was adapting quickly to what it needed.

The young woman yawned, showing long, pointy incisive. She then stretched and hopped out of the bed and on her feet, before going to the basin of water in one corner of the room and washing her face. The girl then dressed herself with the tunic Leofhild had given her some time ago; she placed a leather belt around her waist and finally put her boots on.

Moving to the window, she opened it and suddenly froze; the air was permeated with the smell of leather, oil, male musk and iron…it was distinctly Orcs or Uruk-hai.

She glanced down in the court: the horses were neighing and pawing at the ground. The sun was now rising and people were getting out of their houses to begin the day. Scared, Ethelred looked around for the next few minutes, but could not see anything suspicious or giving hint of the enemy's presence.

Suddenly, Hell broke loose; she saw dark forms climbing over the walls surrounding Edoras, killing the sentries there.

The girl went out the window and let herself fall on the roof before starting to run on them toward the center of the town. Panicked screams were now heard around; Ethelred halted on a roof and hid there, looking at what was going on.

Frowning, the teenager watched as some of the beasts dragged the Rohirrims women into the central place while others fought with the men.

Ethelred remained there, frozen; she recognized some of the Uruk-hai… there was only one reason why they were there. If she'd go back inside and was subtle enough, she could leave the town without anyone noticing.

As those thoughts crossed her mind, guilt invaded her chest: it would be coward to do that. She closed her eyes; these people were her people and they were now being attacked because of her.

Making up her mind, she sprinted forward and jumped off of the house she was on and landed in the middle of the fight. She bent on herself a bit before abruptly turning and back handing a nearby orc. The smaller being went flying and rolling on the ground. Another jumped on her back; she grabbed it and threw him away, wrenching him from her shoulders. The orcs yelped in pain and looked at her fearfully.

Ah! she had missed kicking snaga's asses.

Ethelred narrowly avoided a blade, regretting the absence of her own weapons and swiped at her attacker in bear-like way, all claws out. She caught him on the side of the head, sending him to the ground. Enraged, she bent her ears backward and let out a loud roar.

Immediately, it was answered by a more terrifying, louder one; the young woman gulped down with difficulty. Everyone stopped fighting at once and the Uruk-hai and Orcs parted to let pass a huge Uruk.

Of course…it _had_ to be him… _Mauthak._

The tall beast growled again, more quietly this time and let the sound die to a low rumble as he advanced toward her, his eyes never leaving her form.

Ethelred could feel her heart beating like mad in her chest as the sound nearly made her deaf. He hadn't changed a bit; his hair was still in a half ponytail and he wore the same armor.

She slowly recoiled from him even at the large distance that separated them. In the corner of her sight, she saw Lughorn pushing his way between uruks and men to see what was happening. They exchanged a brief glance and she saw she was in trouble.

The girl adopted a defensive position, lowering her head and ears…growling low. The gesture made the approaching Uruk snap his teeth at her, reminding her who was in charge here.

The huge male finally stopped a few meters from her. He glanced around with calculating eyes and spoke in the common tongue: '' Ethelred… that's not a very kind way to welcome friends…'' He began in his deep voice.

Blanching, the girl looked around: the villagers had wide, horrified eyes and were now whispering among them, pointing at her. They understood.

Oh, the conniving son of a bitch… Now, she could not stay here no matter what.

He spread his arms open and gestured around them: '' What are you doing here…among… _men_ …?'' He said the last part with a hint of disgust.

The girl refused to answer him with words and growled again, showing her displeasure. Mauthak's eyes narrowed in anger: '' I came to get you.'' He informed her.

Even though fear was taking whole of her being, she replied: '' I won't go with you.''

The Uruk-hai around groaned and whooped at the challenge.

A steady growl was building in both her chest and Mauthak's; without warning, the pair began to sprint toward one another.

They collided violently and Ethelred dodged his arm before punching him in the chest; it barely had any effect on him. He grabbed her forearm and threw her the other way with a roar. The girl flipped in the air and landed on her hands and knees, before attacking again. She swiped at him with her claws, but he avoided her hands each time.

The Orcs and Uruk-hai watching shouted to their leader; the humans were silently observing with frightened looks.

The pair tried to hit each other for some time; they exchanged blows for a few minutes.

In the end, Ethelred grabbed him around the waist and tried to push him backward; it didn't work so well. The male began to punch her in the back and finally shoved her down. She rolled on her side, quickly escaping his reaching hand, which she bit.

The Uruk captain growled in pain and lost patience; he picked her up and crushed her back to his chest, suffocating her. When she refused to abandon and kept trying to wriggle free, the male sunk his fangs in her neck.

She roared at the pain, but stopped any movement, afraid he would rip her throat out.

They stayed like this as Mauthak's soldiers yelled out to him and roared his victory. When he finally released her, he said loudly so all could understand: '' You will come with me without a fight now or I swear I will kill every man here, woman and child. ''

People stared at her with pleading eyes and Ethelred closed her own in a defeated manner: '' Just…don't hurt them…'' She whispered.

He put his lips at her ear: '' **I won't** '' he rumbled softly in Black Speech.

The Uruk kept her tightly against him and ordered to one of his lackeys to fetch a rope; it was rapidly brought over and her hands were tied together in front of her.

The end of the rope was given to Lughorn who was sending her apologetic looks; Ethelred averted her eyes. It was like before all over again…she was trapped.

She watched as Mauthak shook himself and ordered loudly: '' **Take anything edible or useful and we're going**. '' He gave a hard look at his men: '' **Don't kill anyone unless they attack you**. ''

He spun around to face her again and walked to her before grabbing her chin in one huge paw to raise it. She looked down as her ears plastered themselves to her head.

The male inspected her for some time and wiped away the blood from his bite. She winced and shook him off.

'' **Things have changed,** Kalsak.'' He told her.

Ethelred refused to speak; Mauthak sighed and shooed Lughorn away as he walked toward a house, probably to search it.

Xxxxxx

*many hours later*

The group of Orcs and Uruk-hai finally took dried meat and bread, a few weapons and five women. It wasn't so bad considering they were Uruk-hai… Normally, everyone would have been killed and the place burned. The Uruk Captain probably wanted to lay low.

Ethelred watched the women as they walked in single file, their hands attached like hers. They were sobbing softly and the girl felt sorry for them; no one deserved this treatment and what awaited them.

Mauthak pulled on her rope from where he sat on his Warg, making her stumbled forward a bit; she glared at him and hissed.

He growled in return, the meaning clear: _you shut up and behave_.

Their procession was a mix of people on foot and riding Wargs; she didn't know where their destination was, but they were heading North/East.

Lughorn appeared at her side: he nudged her with his knee, which was at her shoulder level. He was offering her his water gourd, she turned her head away.

'' You need to drink Vogalurz; you've been walking for a long time and we will travel for even longer.''

The young woman pointed her chin at the crying women a bit behind her: '' They need it more than me.'' She grumbled.

Mauthak, who had been observing their chat, nodded. Reluctantly, Lughorn spun his mount around and headed toward the girls.

'' **We will cross a stream soon; you'll drink there. We'll also stop in one hour or two: Orcs and human females weren't made to walk long distances**.'' The Pizdûr informed her.

Ethelred ignored him, knowing it was one of the things that annoyed him the most.

Frustrated, he rumbled: '' **Your place isn't among Men, Thin-Fangs! I'm your mate damn it…And don't deny it. Your place is with me, at my sides**. ''

The girl remained silent, but raised her tied hands and gave him a pointed look: _Mate my ass_.

He shifted on the beast back to better face her: '' **_That_** **…is only a precaution; one you've earned yourself by attacking your fellows**.''

Ethelred didn't reply and resumed sulking.

They kept advancing for two more hours and the group finally stopped for the night close a forest's edge. The Uruk captain knotted the rope around a tree and left her there to go see over his troop.

The teenager sat down unhappily and banged her head against the tree behind her. She stayed alone for at least an hour; they had lightened fires and were eating while she was attached here. Soon, footsteps came her way; the girl immediately knew who it was even though her eyes were shut.

'' I'm sorry it's like this, Vogalurz. Here, I brought you water and meat. '' Lughorn said softly, offering her dried meat and a gourd.

She nodded to him and slowly ate in a dejected way. The second in command remained sitting at her side, silently watching her.

The Uruk was staring at her with his large, green eyes, just like a curious cat. There was a mix of concern and sadness into them. Lughorn had often looked at her that way.

'' I missed you.'' He suddenly confessed.

The girl sighed deeply: '' I missed you too… Well, I'm not so sure right now.'' She grumbled.

''I- You know how Mauthak is.''

She rolled her eyes: '' Yeah…Believe me, I know.''

Someone arrived behind them: '' **Leave us, Lughorn**.'' A deep voice rumbled.

The smaller Uruk squeezed her shoulder, rose and went away. Mauthak stood in front of her, eyeing her down with a reproachful look.

Terror crept inside her stomach; he would hurt her…push her on the ground and take her brutally like he often did in the past. He would mark her again as he relieved himself.

However, he simply stood there: '' **Why did you leave?** ''

She looked up at him: '' **What a stupid question**.'' She drawled.

The male growled and stepped threateningly toward her: '' **You don't understand Ethelred…I know things were… difficult-** ''

'' **-They were and that's why I left. I was mistreated and abused by you. I'm human and it was not my place there!** '' She cut him off roughly.

The huge Uruk stared at her and breathed deeply: '' **I told you; things have changed or they will soon… I've a plan; I don't wish to battle with the race of Men or anyone anymore. I have many more people with me…we're leaving to a safe place to live in peace**.''

This…was quite surprising; particularly coming from him.

'' **Good for you, but I'm not coming; let me go**.''

He shook his great head: '' **You're my mate and I'm not leaving you.** '' he said on a final tone.

Ethelred's panic flared to life again when Mauthak began to remove his thick armor of metal. Once it was done, the male knelt and crawled to her from.

This is it; it would happen again. The girl stiffened and curled up on herself, getting ready for the assault.

The uruk grabbed her around the waist and hauled her into his chest as he laid on his side: '' **The nights are still cold; this way you'll stay warm even if you're away from the fires**.''


End file.
